In 1980 I had the opportunity to visit Chicago. This was my fist adventure onto American soil. Myself and three co-workers spent an interesting week living at the Downtown Hilton.
It is a fine old hotel boasting four or five bars and about the same number of restaurants.
What caught my eye right after checking in was it also had a liquor store.
After gruelling flight in business class what I needed was another beer! But what to buy? I knew nothing about American brands, I decided to pick the one with the best looking label. And that was Michelob!
After a quick icy cold Michelob in the hotel room it was time to regroup with the rest of the boys in the bar.
After a couple of beers one of our number decided that he wanted to go out and explore the town. The rest of us opted to stay right where we were.
Tom was gone about an hour. When he returned his eyes were really big, and it looked like he had seen a ghost.
After a couple of strong belts of medicinal whiskey he told us his story.
He had opted to exit the hotel through the back door, and that was his first mistake. The Downtown Hilton 'fronts' onto the lake and is very ritzy, the back though dumps you by 'the loop' and is really sleazy. Tom had wandered for a few minutes and had spotted a neon sign advertising 'Mexican Food', and a flashing neon arrow pointing down to the basement of a rather rundown building.
Exercising really poor judgment he had ventured into the establishment.
The first odd thing about it was the abnormally high percentage of women. In fact the only male in the place other than Tom was an 8 foot 6 black guy behind the bar. Tom sidled up to the bar and climbed about a stool.
"What do you want" was the rather gruff greeting the bartender offered.
"Mexican Food" Tom replied.
"We only serve lesbians in here" the bartender continued.
"OH, OK, I'll have one of them and some fries".
Apparently at this point King Kong came from behind the bar, picked Tom up by the scruff of his collar, carried him up the stairs and deposited him in an untidy heap on the sidewalk.